Real handcuffs make escape more difficult
David Copperfield is being investigated by authorities for what was at first an unknown crime. Officer Mike McClure and his team raided a warehouse in Las Vegas owned by Copperfield. There they confiscated a computer hard drive, a digital camera system, and $2 million in cash. The press was not allowed on the scene, however, we have for you a transcribed version of the recording from the police radio:
Officer McClure: This has gone on long enough. We should have known better than to trust a musician!
Copperfield:Musician!? I’m no musician. I’m David Copperfield, Las Vegas’ most famous drug dealer–No! Magician! I’m a magician!
___________
183 responses so far ↓
Newsluxe // October 19, 2007 at 6:42 am
It’s magic !
nikki // October 19, 2007 at 8:59 pm
Somehow Copperfield managed to ‘magic’ himself back from the dead…and ‘magic’ himself a plastic surgeon to help him ‘magically’ look suspiciously like a Ken doll. Hmmm. I think that it is really Satan all dolled up like David so he can ‘magically’ take over the world…he ‘magic’d’ his soul to the Devil!!
Nicholas David // October 22, 2007 at 2:48 pm
Here come the jokes…
Nick // October 23, 2007 at 6:45 pm
David Copperfield didn’t do anything. What reason is there for him to do anything wrong. Anyone who thinks he did it, well then prove it. AND HES NO DEVIL SO FORGET I NIKKI, WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM……NOTHING! ARE YOU A MAGICIAN!? PROBABLY NOT, BUT I AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ryan // October 24, 2007 at 12:03 am
Man crush much Nick? David Cop-a-feel has impregnated your mind with idiocy? Having a Harry Potter wand doesn’t make you a magician.
Nick // October 24, 2007 at 9:05 am
Ryan~
I am above your elementary insults!!! Get a job instead of talking to 13 year olds who do magic shows at schools!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET A LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nikki // October 24, 2007 at 9:09 am
Nick, Nick, Nick…
I am not a ‘magician’ because everyone knows they aren’t real. I am, however, a socerer!! My favorite thing to do is dress up in my awsome capes and robes and tote my staff and mighty wand out on the town. I have a very active social life, what with all the D and D partys I host. I am now in awe of you, oh mighty magician Nick. Will you help me in my quest to find the ring??!
Nick // October 24, 2007 at 9:32 am
Nikki`
Wow you need to get a life. Go find the ring with your imagenary friend. You are not important so I will make you disappear. One, two, three your gone!!!!!!!!
Merlin // October 24, 2007 at 1:43 pm
All of this magic talk will cease or I shall turn you all to monkeys. Except for you, Nick, since you are clearly already an ape.
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:20 pm
Nick speaks of a revolution!!!!!!!!!
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:21 pm
Nikki and Merlin and Ryan are do do eaters who have no life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:22 pm
Nick is the almighty magician
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Merlin is a piece of dokey get a life merlin
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Dnt worry Nick i got your back
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:25 pm
Nick if you dont know who i am i’ll give you a hint i go to your school and i mostly do flag with you.
Still dont know i ask funny questions in miss l’s class.
PS Merlin is DO DO
Gandolf // October 24, 2007 at 3:30 pm
Nick, I think it best if you leave on a journey far far away from your current state. It appears you have a stalker that will probably force a ring on your finger and forever alter you lifestyle.
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:41 pm
shut up Gandolf i will do do on you
jesus // October 24, 2007 at 3:43 pm
leave my child alone
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Gandolf you probably live in your moms basement with your gay boyfriend playing pokemon
so you shouldent be talking
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:45 pm
is that you rob
Chuck Norris // October 24, 2007 at 3:45 pm
I’ll come to your house and roundhouse kick you to the face…
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:46 pm
is it
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:47 pm
yeah it is
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:47 pm
ys this is rob
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:47 pm
rob where you jeaus
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:48 pm
yep
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:48 pm
rob read my stuff above
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:48 pm
gay bf playing pokemon, LOL
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:49 pm
merlin is super gay
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:50 pm
no kidding
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:50 pm
dude call me
ryan // October 24, 2007 at 3:52 pm
Nick, elementary? That was at least a middle school insult. Oh, if you did not notice some dookie lovin flag girl stalker has yo back.
rob // October 24, 2007 at 3:52 pm
channing wrote a sign that reAD “jAGER IS MY BEST FRIEND” IN RETURN FOR THIS WEBSITE SO HE WROTE IT AND I TOOK IT. HE DOESNT HAVE THE WEBSITE
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:53 pm
ryan is do do
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:53 pm
get a life man
jESUS // October 24, 2007 at 3:53 pm
PEACE MY CHIDREN
jESUS // October 24, 2007 at 3:54 pm
CAN I CALL U, DODO
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:55 pm
yo i got to go see ya rob
tell nick to raed the stuff above
PS ryan is do do
Merlin is do do
And
Nikki is do do
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 3:56 pm
rob are you jeaus
jESUS // October 24, 2007 at 3:56 pm
IS IT ALL RIGHT IF I CALL YOU AT YOUR HOUSE, DODO
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 4:57 pm
Nick where are you
DoDo // October 24, 2007 at 4:57 pm
Are you there ryan
frodo // October 24, 2007 at 5:00 pm
nick r uthere
merlin is gayyy!!!! gayer than ricky
frodo // October 24, 2007 at 5:00 pm
u guys are fags
except nick chuck norris dodo and rob
frodo // October 24, 2007 at 5:01 pm
dodo r u there
chan // October 24, 2007 at 5:05 pm
dodo, call when u go on
lakitchensink // October 24, 2007 at 5:42 pm
Dear dodo, frodo, rob, jesus, and chuck norris:
Enlightenment of a technological age.
God // October 24, 2007 at 5:45 pm
Nick, Chuck, Dodo, Rob and Jesus are losers. Your mommies must not allow you to get email accounts – boo-hoo. Have fun when you all get together and circle jerk at your Lord of the Rings party.
I know all. Jesus I disown you.
chan // October 24, 2007 at 5:51 pm
scru u
Gandolf // October 24, 2007 at 7:16 pm
How did you know I live in my mom’s basement??…’can I call you’, or ‘can I call you at HOME’ uhhhhhh, you are totally still living UPstairs in your momma’s house so in your FACE!!! So what if you can’t spell dookie or doo-doo and you seem to be obsessed with poo and your school friends…maybe you should wipe your ass, get off your mamma’s toilet and get over it!
Plus, I’m totally moving out next month….
Merlin // October 24, 2007 at 8:41 pm
Merlin is the almighty wizzard/magician that all you middle school, shat obsessed, fart knockers wish you could be!!
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:38 am
rob are you there
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:38 am
shut up merlin your gay
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:39 am
god~
Get a life your dodo
senor // October 25, 2007 at 9:40 am
sup nick
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:41 am
don’t make fun of dodo
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:41 am
sup senior
Do Do // October 25, 2007 at 9:42 am
Ryan’s d and d partys stand for do do
ryan get a girl friend get job and most importantly get a life.
P.S. im a due unlike your girl friend if you have one .
and for your informaton i have to do my own email account
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:43 am
gandolf is a gay dude who has no life and plays boardgames with his mommy
senor // October 25, 2007 at 9:44 am
i agree
senor // October 25, 2007 at 9:44 am
god eats dodo
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:45 am
lakitchensink
don’t forget nick
senor // October 25, 2007 at 9:47 am
wat does that mean
Do Do // October 25, 2007 at 9:47 am
ryan is a do do lovin freak whos best friend is mrlin
good luck your pokemon guys
Do Do out
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:49 am
nick, chuck norris, and dodo are going to make all you babies who play pokemon disappear poof your dodo your gone
senor // October 25, 2007 at 9:49 am
wat about senor
Ryan // October 25, 2007 at 9:50 am
Do Do makes a lot of sense not nick is weird
I know who you are
im the one with Mary Kate
O yeah
David Copperfield // October 25, 2007 at 9:51 am
i don’t like this garbage. magic is real. all these pokemon sorcerers eat dodo
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:52 am
dodo are you in the bathroom
David Copperfield // October 25, 2007 at 9:53 am
hi dodo
David Copperfield // October 25, 2007 at 9:53 am
rock paper scissors, DODO!!!
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:54 am
david copperfield don’t rape me
Ryan // October 25, 2007 at 9:55 am
Ryan shut up how do we know you like girls ooooooooooooooooooo played
PS. I will do do on you
Peace
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:56 am
david copperfield is inocent
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:57 am
anyone who makes fun of me is dodo and there mom is calling them for lunch
Ryan // October 25, 2007 at 9:58 am
Ryan you are the bigest pice of do do i’ve ever not seen
so shut up
play your pokemon
P.S never say any thing about her again orelse
PPS stay away from little kids
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 9:59 am
merlin is the gayest man on the face of this earth get a life out of your moms basement
David Copperfield // October 25, 2007 at 9:59 am
TOO LATE
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 10:00 am
nikki where are yoooooooooooooooou?
Ryan // October 25, 2007 at 10:00 am
WaZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Upppppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
senor // October 25, 2007 at 10:00 am
whos ryan?????
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 10:01 am
shut up ryan your still in preschool and no one cares about the dirferences of elementary and middle school cause some schools are both your do do and i confirm you do do
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 10:02 am
ryan is do do
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 10:02 am
senor gte a life
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 10:03 am
i know who ryan is rooooooooob
Ryan // October 25, 2007 at 10:03 am
you’ll never know who I am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
merlin // October 25, 2007 at 10:04 am
I’M BACK
lakitchensink // October 25, 2007 at 10:18 am
This is by far the strangest thing I’ve ever seen on my site. I and write a lot of strange things. But you guys make me laugh.
lakitchensink // October 25, 2007 at 10:24 am
But you all are seriously high school nerds. At best. Are you guys seriouly flag twirlers?
nikki // October 25, 2007 at 11:46 am
Most definintly flag twirlers…I am thinking that they don’t have their own computers (or their mommy’s put them on lock down for looking at porn) – hence the reason they have to sneak to the school library and fire off a million unwitty comments in like 2 minutes. Come on! Doo doo -I’m over you. Get your game face on and go on some other articles!
ryan // October 25, 2007 at 2:43 pm
Ain’t nothing like the real thing.
You guys are little homophobic bastards who are secretly gay for each other.
OR WORSE!
Your dookie lovin child molesters.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:23 pm
all you shut your mouths and kiss your mommies
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:27 pm
nikki can you write anything longer your a nerd
but I can’t really talk.
No really. I can’t. My mouth is full of my dad’s balls.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:28 pm
nikki your messages are the stupidest things ever
… much like my face.
J.K Rowling // October 25, 2007 at 3:31 pm
Ryan those harry potter wands could turn you to doo doo if you weren’t already the most kick ass dude alive. I love you. Will you write my books for me?
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:33 pm
ryan i have never read any harry potter book and have no freaken magic wand i have magic powers that can turn you to dust. WHERE IS DO DO and Rob …probably fucking my mom like normal. God, i really hate that. Except when they let me watch the video afterwards.
ryans mommy // October 25, 2007 at 3:35 pm
ryan your bath is already and i bought you a new bottle of Mr. Bubbles.
ryan // October 25, 2007 at 3:43 pm
MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:45 pm
So your back huh
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:47 pm
how was your bubble bath ryan?
no seriously. don’t leave out any details. especially the dirty ones.
ryan // October 25, 2007 at 3:50 pm
It was awsome, your mom and I had a great time. She’s such a dirty little tramp. You can call me daddy, your mom does.
J.K Rowling // October 25, 2007 at 3:50 pm
Ill write any book but stop making fun about my magical wands they will hurt you if you don’t
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:53 pm
You saw my penis?? David Copperfield can’t even do that. It’s too small.
chan // October 25, 2007 at 3:54 pm
u guys are really stupid
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:54 pm
Come on do do and chuck norris where are you?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
chan // October 25, 2007 at 3:54 pm
sup nick
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:55 pm
Get a life jackie chan
chan // October 25, 2007 at 3:55 pm
its channing
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:58 pm
who ever is trying to be nick you can’t no one is that lame. plus your wrong i am not gay so why would david copperfield be looking. Okay okay. He doesn’t look because he is ashamed. I don’t know why. I never feel guilty after we screw.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 3:59 pm
CHANNING how the hell did you know wheres dodo and rob
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:00 pm
channing i think these guys want to be me there signing on as me will you come fuck me later?
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:00 pm
I mean I am transvestite who whores himself to men but I’m not gay.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:01 pm
Yooooo shut your gay mouth im as straight as a line. and i do love me some taint.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:02 pm
….line of cocaine in a gay bar
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:03 pm
ballzzzzz in my face… ballllzzz in my face… yeah yeah yeah yeah love me some ballzzz in my faaaaaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaace.
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:04 pm
your the one on crack your as straight asa circle. So shut up
Nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:05 pm
your the one on crack your as straight asa circle. So shut up
SHUT UP! ALL OF THE VOICES!!
Jesus // October 25, 2007 at 4:07 pm
lets all live in peace lets lk about the bible
jESUS // October 25, 2007 at 4:07 pm
nick?
jESUS // October 25, 2007 at 4:08 pm
its rob… I JUST finished up with your mom. wanna come watch the video?
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:09 pm
this other nick come on as a different name your making this all messed up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i’ve gone a little nuts. will you still be my friend?
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:10 pm
RRRROOOOOBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB did you read my gay messages
chan // October 25, 2007 at 4:11 pm
Rob just did nick’s mom show your face
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:12 pm
Of course ill be your friend for life
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:13 pm
This chan is stupid
The Gay Pride Brigade lead by nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:13 pm
Nick, we would like to invite you to become our charter member since you are clearly the proudest gay man in America. Good for you!! Remember be loud, be proud and get use to balls in yo face.
love nick (super-president)
Chan // October 25, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Nick…Your mom gave Rob herpes. That’s messed up
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:14 pm
I love satan.
Nick the real one // October 25, 2007 at 4:17 pm
The Gay Pride Brigade im not gay your the leader i shall not follow thy gay leaders
(nick 12:23)
jESUS // October 25, 2007 at 4:17 pm
wat
fuck you nick! satan is bad, ok? but if you’re down with him, i guess you can blow me. at color guard practice.
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:17 pm
Wow. Nick, I am really disappointed with your Oedipus complex (look it up when you go to the school library tomorrow)….aren’t you going to YouTube your mom and your friends?
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:18 pm
yo stop trying to be me i know you want to be straight like me but it takes time. But not to get inside of my b/c my butt hole is so loose. You could practically fall right in.
rob // October 25, 2007 at 4:19 pm
nick if you r there, reply our secret word (it starts with an d)
deeeeeeezzzzzzz nuuuuuutttttttsssss
rob // October 25, 2007 at 4:19 pm
curse u nikki
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:20 pm
nikki my daddy is ready (to) go upstairs.
……………..if i pay you $1000 will you blow him. he hasn’t had a blowjob since he and my mom conceived me.
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Clearly you have been practicing really hard at flag practice how ‘not’ to be gay. Ya’ll sure do bring up the gay subject quite a bit. Is this a self awareness journey that you are dragging us all on??
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:23 pm
rob we have no secret word
(deeeeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzz nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutttttttttttzzzzzzzzzz in my mouth)
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:24 pm
Nikki your so right you must be a magician
rob // October 25, 2007 at 4:26 pm
i am gay come back to me nikki
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:26 pm
ding dong
rob // October 25, 2007 at 4:27 pm
i am in love with nikki she sounds very hot.
…… if only i liked women.
rob // October 25, 2007 at 4:28 pm
who here likes that nick kid? okay now who likes me? does anyone like doo doo
rob the hott one // October 25, 2007 at 4:28 pm
u bet
rob the hott one // October 25, 2007 at 4:29 pm
mike?
do you think it’s cool i spelled hott with 2 t’s??
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:30 pm
rob you are gay your boyfriends are waiting
but you can have me while you wait……………………………………………
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:31 pm
stop being more awesome than me!!!!!!!!!!
rob the hott one // October 25, 2007 at 4:31 pm
david copperfield
is doodooo
rob the hott one // October 25, 2007 at 4:33 pm
nick it is really is swear to god rob in ur class. i lm fat and hott.
……. remember??? we went to flag twirling practice together yesterday!!!!!! And I was out of breath after a few twirls. remember!!!!
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:33 pm
david copperfield could turn you to doodoo
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:35 pm
nice comesack wait what comesack?
………..oh yeah. the one in my mouth!
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Who wants to ………… me im free tonight
Nikkis daddy // October 25, 2007 at 4:37 pm
i do i do i do come on please
Nick the original // October 25, 2007 at 4:38 pm
dude your not funny get a life
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:40 pm
Nick … I can tell just from reading that you have a small cock.
jesus // October 25, 2007 at 4:43 pm
nick, i saw your masturbating to rob’s yearbook picture. don’t do that if you want to get into heaven.
jesus // October 25, 2007 at 4:44 pm
Nikki stop lying and nick remove yourself from this hate
santa claus // October 25, 2007 at 4:47 pm
yeah, i saw nick with the yearbook too. no Power Ranger toys for him this year.
nick // October 25, 2007 at 4:48 pm
rob’s not gay but i am
Nikki // October 25, 2007 at 4:54 pm
Damn, yall!! I step away for 2 seconds and you gotta try to be me. You all suck at it by the way. However, Rob, I am super hott, not free and also saw Nick masturbating to animal porn so I’m pretty sure he is going to burn in the fiery gates of hell.
Hanakka Harry // October 25, 2007 at 4:55 pm
Nooooo dredle for you, nasty little boy.
a // October 25, 2007 at 5:06 pm
u guys are big faggots u suc dick at being nick rob and jesus go fuck urselves
jasper // October 25, 2007 at 5:12 pm
hi
jasper // October 25, 2007 at 5:14 pm
yo rob
jasper // October 25, 2007 at 5:14 pm
r u jasper????????
lakitchensink // October 25, 2007 at 5:14 pm
Holy wow. I’m so confused as to what happened here. Who are you people? And why are you all making fun of yourselves? None of this makes any sense.
jasper // October 25, 2007 at 5:18 pm
holy crap!!!!!!!!!!
nick // October 25, 2007 at 6:19 pm
I am a giant man-whore.
nick // October 25, 2007 at 6:20 pm
haha. yeah i am. i said that right.
booboo // October 26, 2007 at 10:13 am
i am the best and i and peter
booboo // October 26, 2007 at 10:21 am
i am the best out of all of u and i kill i kill
nikki // October 26, 2007 at 10:40 am
Boo Boo scares me….
britney spears // October 26, 2007 at 3:56 pm
hey nick
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 3:57 pm
britney
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 3:58 pm
whos nick?
britney spears // October 26, 2007 at 3:59 pm
hey misty
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 4:00 pm
britney hello?
britney spears // October 26, 2007 at 4:01 pm
i dont know
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 4:01 pm
i lone your music can i get a autograph
britney spears // October 26, 2007 at 4:01 pm
maybe later
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 4:01 pm
love your music
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 4:02 pm
You know who I just about slept with last night? Nick.
britney spears // October 26, 2007 at 4:02 pm
No??? Was his dick as small as I’ve heard?
Misty // October 26, 2007 at 4:03 pm
Even smaller than Robs! Can you believe that????
Like gas stations in rural Texas after 10 pm, comments are closed.